Writings
The Losses of Our Lives
The Sacred Gifts of Renewal in Everyday Loss
Author: Dr Nancy Copeland-Payton Skylight Paths Publishing
Who has not been touched by loss? This book invites us awaken to life’s endless stream of immeasurable gifts … and our experience of loss at their passing. To embrace the wisdom taught to us in our everyday losses can bring us closer to the deep mystery of God and the nature of living. Such wisdom can help sustain us on journeys through life’s more painful losses.
“When we intentionally enter into our everyday walk through small losses, the terrain of larger losses, the valley of the shadow of death, is not totally unknown. It is not completely unfamiliar, alien, terrifying, for we have walked some of this way before with our lesser losses. We can journey through this valley of loss, for journey through it we must. And we can emerge markedly changed, but alive, on the other side.”
Written for those experiencing loss and those accompanying them, this poignant and practical book shows us how to be attentive to the unceasing rhythm of gift and loss. It explores this arc of gift and loss beginning with our birth and growing up, takes us through mid-age, and ends with our own dying. Weaving spiritual and classical themes, powerful personal and scriptural stories, we are invited to venture deeper into our own losses through practical exercises drawn from the world’s major faith traditions.
Praise for the book:
“Captures beautifully the paradox that the losses of our lives can become our gains. By weaving story, experience and faith … shows how our deepest hurts may be the soil that nurtures the seeds of our transformation.”
Sr Clarissa Goeckner, prioress, Monastery of St Gertrude
“An extraordinary and wise guide in the treacherous terrain of loss.”
Rabbi Dayle A. Friedman, author, Jewish Visions for Aging
“This beautifully written and deeply pastoral book touched my soul as the stories melded with my stories to explore ever more deeply the fabric of gift and loss in our lives. To everyone who deals with losses – and that’s all of us – I highly recommend it.”
Rev Clifton Kirkpatrick, president
World Alliance of Reformed Churches
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Awake for the Sunrise (published in Horizons Magazine, Jan-Feb 2011)
A banner in the seminary lobby says, “Why can’t God just send an e-mail?” In the background is a barefoot, wide-eyed
Moses before a wildly burning bush.
Sacred voice that speaks from a burning bush, or an e-mail sent from God seem so direct, so enticingly unambiguous. Don’t we all
yearn for such clarity? And yet, book after book on discernment speaks of God’s subtle whispers deep within us, or the Spirit’s quiet nudges. Elijah listened in the grandeur of wind, earthquake, and fire … but only heard God’s voice in the sound of sheer silence. (1 Kings 19.11-3)
How might God communicate with us?
And can we quicken our awareness of divine presence? Can we quiet ourselves and learn to listen?
Spiritual disciplines can help awaken us to God’s presence. When we engage in time-honored disciplines and let them mold us, they can help form us into a listening people.
A novice once asked a master if spiritual disciplines would make him wise.
The master answered, “No, not any more than you can make the sun rise.”
The novice said, “Then, why do the disciplines?”
The master replied, “To make sure that you are awake when the sun rises.”
There is nothing magic about spiritual disciplines. Like discernment, they are not something we unpack, dust off, and bring
out for the “big” decisions in life. Rather, spiritual disciplines gradually shape us over time. They form us into a posture, an attitude of listening for God in all of life.
A good place to begin our listening, is where God’s voice has been reliably heard in the past, such as in scripture and prayer.
An ancient Christian way of listening for the Spirit speaking in scripture is called lectio divina. In Latin, this means sacred reading. Lectio divina is really a slow, contemplative praying of scripture.
To begin, let yourself become quiet.
Then, turn to a short passage of scripture. Read it slowly and gently. Savor the text. Listen for the “still, small voice” of a
word, phrase or image that captures you, that speaks to you.
Read the passage again. Let the word, phrase or image sink into you. Repeat it, memorize it, turn it over and over in your mind. Allow it to interact with you and with your life.
Let this inner pondering lead you into dialogue with God. Speak with God as you would speak with one who loves and accepts you. In this prayer, share what has come in your time with the scripture. Listen for what God might be saying to you through the word, phrase or image.
Finally, let your thoughts settled. Rest silently in God’s presence.
As you turn into daily life, you may wish to carry the word, phrase or image with you and continue to listen intentionally.
Bidden or not bidden, God is present throughout your day. May this way of praying scripture remind you of God’s constant presence.
